They are not special, but they’re mine. I’ve distilled them down over the last few years; they are a result of me getting a sense of who I am, together with what a person I want to be.
(Wow, that sounded way less pretentious in my mind.)
- Don’t be a dick.
- Don’t fuck it all up.
- Don’t forget to be kind.
- Don’t delay having fun.
- Don’t stop moving, ever.
Turns out that for me, they kind of cover every imaginable situation. And yes, I broke all of them in the past, too. I just try really hard to not let it happen again.
Allow me to quickly go through them.
1. Don’t be a dick.
That’s pretty self-explanatory, I think. I try to be respectful, or neutral at least, even if the other person is wrong in my eyes. Even if they are, there’s usually something I don’t know about them or their lives that made them that way. If I have to, I can behave like an adult when disagreeing.
(The only exception are nazis and people who think themselves superior to others due to the circumstances of their birth. Fuck ‘em, I have no time for that shit.)
2. Don’t fuck it all up.
I try to keep the number of personal regrets I have as low as possible, so when making a somewhat important decision I usually make it deliberately. I do that both in my daily work and in my daily life.
Meaning, I know that even most of the bad decisions I’ve made in the past I’ve made after weighing my options carefully and going with what I felt was right and good at the time. It might sound silly but… I can’t be mad at that. Past Carlo did his best to not let Present Carlo down, and Present Carlo does his best to not let Future Carlo down, you know?
3. Don’t forget to be kind.
I got that from the 12th Doctor, basically, and it’s a beautiful notion. A little kindness goes a long way, even if it’s just a smile at the right time. “Leave the place a little better than you’ve found it”, etc. Even if I have to tell someone that I don’t have time for them right now, I will do it in a friendly way.
4. Don’t delay having fun.
It’s very, very easy for me to get swept up in work, I know that by now. Unfortunately, I needed a rule to remind me to not postpone the good life and shenanigans if possible. I’m getting better at this, little by little. 😋
5. Don’t stop moving, ever.
I know people who at some point in their life decided they’re “done” as a person, and they’re usually a boring bunch. Stagnation is the silent killer. So I try to pick up new things and learn new stuff and open up to new people etc. All the time! And every time I do I gain something new! For example, I got a longboard two years ago, it’s ace. And I started rapping last year, recording songs, performing in front of people. (Side note: I’m 46.) I’m not very good, I don’t aim for making it big, I don’t do it as much as I’d like, I am nervous AF every single time the beat starts, but… man, I am alive! That must never stop.
It’s like finding new pieces for a big-ass puzzle you thought looked kinda finished but really, really isn’t, not even close.
Let’s be excellent to eachother, people ❤️