1080p!!!1 I don’t know whether technically this qualifies as joke, but I laughed.
Re-roll. Kind of sad, but I’m in pretty much the same spot. Sans the couch.
Wikipedia. xkcd nails the problem with Wikipedia.
Buzz donuts. [via JR] Scientist develops caffeinated doughnuts. Oh yes. Each donuts contains the caffeine of approximately two cups of coffee.